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Prayers for my Dad please - cancer

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Re: Prayers for my Dad please - cancer

Postby BrettDeason » Tue Apr 26, 2016 9:46 pm

How do you help people who do not appreciate your help? And these same people treat you like crap. These same people talk down to you. These same people ridicule you. These same people mentally and verbally attack you. How do you help people who do these things to you?

I'm helping my Parents. They treat me these ways, and more that I can't even think of now.

My Dad has cancer. My Mom and I both do everything around here and my Mother and I are both around my Dad and his cancer all the time, everyday. My Dad and Mom are both ill, angry, all the time, everyday.

Please help me with this situation please.
Thanks.

- Brett Deason
Yahweh Elohim Bless All Adamic People who obey Him
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Re: Prayers for my Dad please - cancer

Postby BrettDeason » Mon May 09, 2016 12:14 am

Here's a situation. I do all sorts of things for my Parents. They do feed me at times. But, they don't respect my diet of Yahweh's clean foods. So, they will at times feed me pork, telling me it's chicken, so that I'll eat it. They don't respect my diet of Yahweh's clean foods. They don't care for it. They don't understand it. I've explained it to them a million times now. They act like it is a huge problem for them to not feed me pork. They act like it is an inconvenience for them to not feed me pork.

- Brett Deason
May Yahweh Elohim Blesses All His Adamic People Who Obey Him
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Re: Prayers for my Dad please - cancer

Postby Joe » Mon May 09, 2016 4:03 am

I would definitely take steps to ensure I do not eat swine, just checking over the meal. They really are making it into a big deal, it's true, it would be much simpler to just respect your wishes. My family is the same, the catholic church has made them very resistant to Christianity.

You really are a top bloke Brett, looking after your stubborn folks.
May God bless you too Brett.
...and a flaming sword which turned every way, to keep the way of the tree of life.
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Re: Prayers for my Dad please - cancer

Postby BrettDeason » Mon May 09, 2016 8:42 am

Thank you so very much! I really do greatly appreciate your compliment!

An update on my Dad is that he is still going thru chemo treatments for his cancer. He is losing his hair on his head from the chemo treatments. He gets his chemo treatments every Thursday so far. His numbers from his blood work, are improving. He is gaining weight, but only one or two pounds a week at a time. He is up and moving around more and trying to do more things. He does sleep most of the time, though. He is still an ass hole. It hasn't changed that. He is still stubborn. He is still difficult to deal with. He is still difficult to be around. He is still difficult to help. He is still a stubborn, difficult, ass hole.

My Mother and I are doing everything around here now. It is way too much for just her and I. But, nobody else will help. It is very stressful. It is very draining emotionally and physically and psychologically.

- Brett Deason
My Heavenly Father is Yahweh Elohim
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Re: Prayers for my Dad please - cancer

Postby BrettDeason » Mon May 09, 2016 9:46 am

I also wanted to mention that people who are not living what me and my Mother are living on a daily basis here, just do not understand at all, what we are going thru. Not unless they are living it themselves, or they have lived it themselves, during their life.

I can talk about, explaining it in detail. I can explain it in detail, in writings. But, unless you are here living it on a daily basis, then you will never understand what it is.

I have family members and so called friends who just do what they want to do and just live how they want to live. To them, that is life. To them, that is their life. And to them, that is all life is about. I have so called friends who don't take care of their own Parents, nor anyone else in their own family, while, their own Parents, and other members of their own family are dying of illnesses, while they live their lives on their own happy terms. So called friends of mine, have children, who they don't even raise, and the people who are raising their children, are very ill. One so called friend, who's Parent's raise his kids, is doing anything and everything he wants to do, while his Parents are having to use oxygen tanks to help them breath, because they are in such a poor condition. I have an Uncle, who raised his granddaughter, because her own Parents are shit, and now he is battling cancer himself, while she is off living on her own terms, getting thrown into jail because of drugs and other shit, and her Grandfather is having to bail her out over and over, time and time again, while she is not helping to take care of him, she lives how she wants to live. My very own 16 year young niece, lives however she wants to live, too. She was given a brand new car from my Parents, her Grandparents, that she has already wrecked, yet, she does not help at all, not even when she is here. She doesn't help us here, nor, her own Parents, who she lives with. My 16 year young selfish teenage niece, also has her cellphone paid for on a monthly basis by my Parents - her Grandparents - and my Parents also give her new phones every time she breaks the phone she has, which came from them too. But, she doesn't help anyone out at all ever. I have an Uncle who has children, who are in their 30's, who do not work at all. They also live life on their own terms. Yet, they live with him. He is the only person working, while his three adult children, and his wife, and his granddaughter, all live in the same house, and, yet, he is the only person working. He does everything. He cooks, He grocery shops. He cuts their grass. He works two jobs. They do nothing at all. He is in horrible condition as well, yet, it's like, they don't give a shit.

I have so called friends, and, family members, who have already planned beach trips for their Summer plans. They tell me that I can go visit with them. They do not come here and help. I do not have time to go visit anybody, anywhere, for any length of time. This is not something that I can just up and get away from. This is life. You can't escape life. I feel like, if I go somewhere, to go visit people, or to get away, or take time away from this, or whatever you want to call and however you want to see it, that I'm just running from all of this. And, I don't want to run from this. I want to tackle it head on. Not run away from all of this. I have responsibilities here. I'm not going to stick my head in the sand, or run away from all of it. Am I wrong for thinking about it that way? Am I wrong for seeing it that way? I have so called friends and family members who think that coming over here and visiting is a good idea. Right now, it is not. If they come and help, great! They will get fed and probably even paid. But, only if they help. This is not Disneyland, nor Six Flags, nor Disney World, nor a vacation resort. This is not the time to come visit and go swimming here and fishing here and eat and sit and talk and gossip and catch up. There is tons of shit to be done here that keep my Mother and I busy non stop here. If company comes and helps, then awesome! But, if they don't help, they do not need to come at all! I have so called friends and family members that think that coming here and visiting is all about swimming and eating and relaxing and all of that shit, which it is not - not right now, it is not - and it probably will never be like that ever again here - because, even after my Dad gets better, and is not sick anymore, there will still be everything to do here, and my Mother and I will still be busy all the time here. If so called friends and family members do actually come and help here. They wouldn't last more than one day here. If they last one day at all. And they would never come back, because they would experience how much work is done here, and it is too much for them. But, when my Dad does get better from this, then, yes, momentarily, I would then, just for a brief moment, be okay to relax and party. Then, it would be party time. Then, it would be going to the beach time. Hell, I'll even pay for everybody's fucking beach trips myself! But not right now. Right now, is not that time. Right now, is not the time to party down.

We are so busy here all the time, that things that people do every day, which they take for granted, like eating and using the bathroom and taking a shower, and so forth, we have to do very quickly, because we don't have the luxury, nor the time, to take time showering, or to take time eating, or to take time doing anything at all.

- Brett Deason
Yashua Christ is My Kinsman Redeemer and Yashua Christ is my Adamic Brother
Last edited by BrettDeason on Mon May 09, 2016 10:26 am, edited 2 times in total.
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Re: Prayers for my Dad please - cancer

Postby BrettDeason » Mon May 09, 2016 10:23 am

I also want to mention the fact that my Mother is sick as well. Yet, she will not let me take her to the Doctor for her to been seen at least, so that we would at least know what is wrong with her. Her stomach has been hurting her for over two months now, at least. She has trouble keeping what she eats down. She throws up most of the time, after she eats. Her bones hurt. Her muscles hurt. Her neck hurts. Her back hurts. Her hands hurt. She has trouble sleeping. There is more than likely, tons more that is bothering her and hurting her, and tons more that is wrong with her, that I don't even know about. She doesn't tell me about all her health problems. I can see her in pain throughout the whole day, every day. She gets mad at me and fusses at me and gets ill with me whenever I ask her about her health. She is so focused on Dad, that she buries her own health problems. I would drive her to see a Doctor. I would stay with Dad, if she goes by herself to see a Doctor.

- Brett Deason
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Re: Prayers for my Dad please - cancer

Postby Les » Sat May 14, 2016 1:28 pm

Brett,
I am amazed you are keeping it together with all the stress on you. If it was me, I would have lost my mind by now.
I helped my sister take care of my sick father the last 6 months/year he was around, and lost my temper a couple times. (No, I don't feel guilty about that as he used to yell his head off a lot at me my whole life).
My older brothers almost never visited during this time, and didn't help.

It got to the point where I had enough of his constant complaining, and moved into a friend's apartment, and that same night was when my Dad finally had some major attack, and an ambulance had to take him to the hospital for his last day or something.

My mother was the same as yours, always trying to make me eat pork for like 5 years after I told her I don't eat that crap anymore and it was poison. She kept making it, but I just stopped eating the meat she made, unless I KNEW absolutely for sure it was chicken or beef or turkey.

Older people are STUBBORN and will NOT listen to facts.
You can show pictures and statistics of the parasites and the cancers that pig meat has caused, and they still will eat it. They are as foolish as people smoking cigarettes.
I used to smoke, and no matter what anybody said or showed, you could not convince me to stop, as I enjoyed it too much.
BUT once away from the work and living environments, and away from other smokers, I don't crave or think about it.

Brett,
it is a struggle for you right now, right? and your works may seem unappreciated, but your self sacrifice will place you ahead of many others (like me!) in the Kingdom.
You really deserve a friend or woman or relative in your life to help you at this time.
Will keep you in my thoughts.

PS.
Hitting a punching bag, or breaking stuff against a wall, or shooting at pop bottles, can help you relax / relieve stress!
;)
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Re: Prayers for my Dad please - cancer

Postby BrettDeason » Sat May 14, 2016 2:55 pm

Thank you for your kind words and for your concern.
Thank you all for all of y'alls words and concerns.

- Brett Deason
May Yahweh Elohim Kill All Jews!
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Re: Prayers for my Dad please - cancer

Postby BrettDeason » Tue Sep 06, 2016 5:14 pm

My Family is not making plans for my Mother's future. I don't understand. My Sister and my Brother both say that my Mom is an adult and she will be okay by herself in the big house she will live in by herself once Dad is passed. He's on his last days. He will pass anytime now. My Brother doesn't want to move up here from Florida and take care of her. My Sister doesn't want to move in with my Mother. But, my Family is acting like they are just taking me for granted and taking advantage of me , because I live right beside my Parents and because I don't have a Family of my own. But, I want to move on in my life. I'm putting in job applications here locally. I'm putting in applications to apartments here locally. I don't want to be the person who my Family depends on to care for Mom just cause they are used to doing it and used to me being the one who does care for my Parents. My Brother and Sister keep asking me why I am wanting to move away ? They aren't , instead, making future plans for my Mom and that house of her and dad's. They are, instead, trying to question me as to why I'm taking it upon myself to plan for my future and to look for jobs and places to live. They need to be making plans for Mom now. They should have made plans already before now. The past year and longer, since April of 2015, when I jumped into action helping my Parents after Dad was diagnosed with Cancer, the rest of my Family - mainly and including my Brother and Sister - should have been making future plans for both of my Parents. And now that they have this time to make the plans, they are instead asking me about why I'm wanting to leave and move on? My Family treats me like crap. They talk down to me. They don't respect me at all. They respect my Brother - I guess 'cause he has all the money in the Family. My Parents - whom I help - I'm the only one who stepped up and helped - treat me mean and hateful and crappy. So, I want to move on and live my own life. But, my Family is making me feel like shit 'cause I'm wanting to do that. What kind of answer is that which they are giving about my Mother - that she's an adult and can make her own decisions and choices and live her life 'cause she is an adult ? That makes me think that they don't care for her. Is that how it sounds to you guys too? Like they are trying to guilt me into staying with her to care for her and all of this land and that house. That is the way I'm taking it. Now, let me also mention, that, we have had a grand total of one Family meeting, where my Brother and Sister and myself and our Parents all sat down and tried talking about what the future plans for my Parents and their house and land, are going to be. At that time, my Brother, who has all the money in the Family, was looking at a house to buy for our Parents, for them move down there into, so they would be closer to better Medical care and so they would be closer to my Brother's kids - their grand kids , who live a State away - but, my Mother did not cooperate at all in any way with what my Brother wanted and so my Brother gets mad and says he isn't going to help anymore. Yet, me, the youngest of all three kids, is left stuck here, where I live, right beside my Parents. Whereas, when any other member of my Family come and visit or help , they can go back to their houses and lives which are away from here, while I have no place to run away from all of this because I live here right beside it and right here with it.

Please let me know all of y'alls opinions please.

- Brett Deason
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Re: Prayers for my Dad please - cancer

Postby Nayto » Wed Sep 07, 2016 3:38 pm

In my opinion it is the duty of the sons to care for their parents in the parents' old age. It sounds like your brother wanted to help by having your mom move down to Florida, but she resisted. Maybe that is what he means when he says that she makes her own decisions? It can be hurtful for a son when his parents aren't interested in their grandchildren, so maybe your brother is exasperated. It is a generous thing that he offered for her to move down I think.

Your mom is probably going through a terrible time in her life though. It can be frightening for the elderly as they enter the twilight of their lives to be without a partner. Maybe encourage your brother to be patient with her. She needs time to deal with the imminent loss of her husband.

I'm not sure what you mean by moving on with your life, but I would encourage you to be patient with her and your family in this time. It is a time of transition and people do not like change. Be the one who gives wise and loving advise with patience, keeping everyone together.

Once some time has passed and if it is part of God's permissive will that your father passes on, check to see how your family is feeling in terms of going forward. I very much understand your frustrations, but again, be patient and kind. You will only heap hot coals on the heads of those who do you wrong.

Families are complex things with many nuances and politics, so please keep in mind that my opinion is only based on what you have written and take it as such.
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